Korean Wedding Diary: Meeting the Parents

Hi Lovelies! Sorry, it's been wayyyyyy too long since my last update! Things have been exciting since announcing my engagement! A lot of people back home have been kind of curious about the marriage process in Korea, so I thought I'd write a little series of posts about wedding planning in Seoul. The first one is advice for meeting your Korean bf's parents! Not as scary as you think, I promise!

This was my worst fear.

Well, maybe a little scary lol. I was terrified they'd think I'm messy or immature or totally impossible to relate to as a foreigner. It was great though! Read on for some tips for meeting the parents for the first time.   LF and I got engaged earlier this year, but the wedding planning process is long for us. It's funny--many Korean couples only take a few months to get engaged and plan their entire weddings! We're planning two weddings however, on here and one in the States, so coordinating that means we needed about a year to plan.

I'll get into the details of the process later: choosing a wedding planner, venue, gifts, hanbok, etc. The first step is meeting his parents if you haven't already! Let's be real: your SO probably wouldn't be proposing if you haven't already met his folks. Korean men tend to take their parents' opinions of you into account even more than Western men and that goes double if he was raised in a conservative family. LF's parents are very conservative and hold a lot of old Korean values, so I was quite nervous. My confidence was minimally bolstered by the fact that his parents had known about me for about a year and didn't seem to take issue with him dating foreigner.

If you haven't met your boyfriend's parents yet, don't panic. It's normal here for men not to introduce a gf to their parents until they're super serious (as in planning to marry her eventually). The timeline for couples varies though. In our case, we started dating summer 2014, I met his folks in fall 2015, then he proposed spring 2016. It can be frustrating if you've been dating someone for a long time and still haven't met his family, but try to be patient. :)

   Now when you finally meet them, what to do? What to wear? What to expect? I can only relate my experience, so I hope it's helpful! Keep in mind, LF's parents are conservative Christians, so I went out of my way to free and behave modestly. However, knowing what I know about Korean parents, it's a good idea to dress modestly when meeting them even if you don't know what to expect. Please take this advice with a grain of salt. If you've never worn a dress in your life, I'm not saying you have to lol. Just some friendly suggestions to make both you and them comfortable. ^^

What to wear:

1) Clothing: Modesty should trump fashion in this case, but if you can find something both cute and toned down all the better. You basically want to look put together but not overdone. I recommend a dress or skirt and blouse--not too short, not showing any cleavage. Avoid sleeveless tops, high heels, and too many accessories. Pantyhose or tights help you look more conservative and sensitive to Korean fashion standards. You don't have to dress for a job interview, but look nice and demure.

This is the dress I wore--simple and sweet.

2) Makeup: As you probably expected, less is more. Think fresh faced and natural! If you're not sure, check out some of the No-Makeup makeup tutorials online for how to achieve an enhanced but natural look. Some BB, CC cream, or light cushion foundation with concealer as needed, light wash of eyeshadow, mascara, touch of blush and barely there lip color. I recommend skipping eyeliner too if you can as it makes your face look "stronger." If you can't skip, maybe just tightline it.

3) Hair: Not as strict, but try to keep a conservative style that stays out of your face. If you have a really unnatural color, you might want to tone it down the first couple meetings.

What to bring:

1) Bring a gift--this is nonnegotiable.You probably know it's custom in Korea to bring a gift when you go to someone's home the first time. This is, of course, a very personal choice, but the usual suspects are food, flowers, small gifts for the home, etc. I think seasonal foods are a great choice! When you meet your SO's parents the first time, it will probably not be in their home however. Most couples these days do the first meeting at a restaurant or something. We met at one of those multiple course Korean restaurants, as many couples do. It was good! You can show off your ability to eat and enjoy Korean food and talk about the different dishes. There was another couple there in the same boat, so I felt some solidarity with the guy being introduced to his gf's folks.

Anyway, we met in fall, so I made a persimmon spice cake topped with candied walnuts to bring a bit of autumn flavor to the afternoon. If you have no talent in baking, don't sweat! There are plenty of bakeries selling gorgeous seasonal cakes and breads. Don't go with anything too fancy or frilly, though (no birthday cakes or overly sweet confections). If you bake it yourself, try fashioning a cake box with the gift boxes and ribbon available at stationary stores (or Daiso haha). The next meeting, I had dinner at their home and brought a potted flowering jasmine plant (he said his mom has tons of plants on their balcony) and a big box of...I think pears? Hard to remember haha.    

Pretty, right? I heard they ate the whole thing in one sitting haha.

Extra tips: 

1) Caffiene up! We met his parents for lunch on a Saturday and we're still groggy the night before, so we waited in a cafe by the restaurant. You definitely don't want to look tired, but cheerful and bright eyed. Get that coffee! 

Me getting my coffee fix while LF naps just before the meeting <3

2) Know as much Korean as possible. Even just greetings and basic phrases are better than nothing! This might go without saying, but being able to converse in Korean on a basic level made things go soooooo much more smoothly. They'll  probably be both impressed and relieved, and either way it shows you're making an effort to understand their culture.

3) Familiarize yourself with Korean dining customs. Insist they eat first, be helpful by setting out utensils and pouring drinks. Eat everything they put on your plate (Korean moms like to make you eat haha).

4) Be careful with the PDA. Again, this might be obvious, but try not to cling to your SO even if you're nervous. Even hand holding unless they initiate. Just for the first meeting, you can relax more next time. ;)

5) Expect to stay a while. After lunch, his parents treated us to coffee at a cafe in Olympic Park and we walked around. There was a festival, so his Mom bought us ddeok and took a lot of pictures. The whole thing took about 4 hours.

It was a beautiful fall day ^^

6) Be prepared to answer personal questions, including the infamous "why do you love my son/daughter" question from every drama. They might also discuss your appearance, so just be ready.

   

Overall, it was a great experience meeting LF's parents! We were all a little awkward and shy, but they warmed up to me pretty quickly. I thought they were very kind and felt relieved they seemed to accept me for their son. I've met them a number of times since, but I was really happy outer initial meeting went well given the horror stories I've heard from other couples.

Any stories to share or questions about meeting your Korean BF/GF's parents, please comment below!  Kisses~<3  

Engaged! Korean Proposals

Great news, lovelies! LBF proposed last month and is now LF: the Lovely Fiancé! I'm so thrilled! I'm going to tell you all about it kkkk. 

Basically my reaction ^-^

I haven't written in too much detail about my relationship to respect LF's privacy, but I have to gush just a little bit! He and I started dating June 2014, and I knew he was the one pretty early in the relationship. When it comes to proposals, however, you never know with Korean men. That's because most Korean couples don't even have what Western people think of as "proposals." Or engagements, for that matter! It's more just they know they're going to get married, they have a conversation and just decide. The whole wedding planning process usually takes less than three months! They don't usually have engagement rings either, and buy the rings right before the wedding.

That's really different from how we do it back home, so I tried to adjust my expectations to prepare. I didn't know if he would ever make a formal proposal actually. We had talked for a long time about getting married, but I didn't know if he was waiting for the ok from his parents, or to buy a ring, or just until he felt comfortable. 

In Korea, couples say getting married is expensive because part of it usually involves buying an apartment (jonsei) and all the things to fill it. Therefore, proposing marriage is not a light undertaking and couples feel like they must be financially stable enough to afford all that within a few months.

We, however, are taking the Western route with a year long engagement. It doesn't put so much pressure on us financially allows us longer to make plans for two international weddings. Anyway, I was prepared to be patient is my point.

My worries were unfounded, however, as he delivered an amazingly romantic proposal when we went to Busan at the end of February. I won't gush about specifics, but he took me to a secret and secluded  spot on the beach and it was all so perfect.

He still won't let me put his pics on my blog T.T

For other Western women dating Korean guys, I think the fact that I was upfront about my wishes for a proposal was helpful. I said I understand how they do it in Korea, but I always dreamed of a Western style engagement: formal proposal, engagement ring, and ample time to plan. Of course it's important to be sensitive to cultural differences, but don't be afraid to let him know what's in your heart!

This is my happy face! :3

Right now everything is a dream come true, and I'm floating through my days on a cloud. I can't wait to be Mrs. Lee! Thanks to my friends and family for all the congratulations and good wishes! Now I'm going to continue caressing my ring and trying not to whisper "My preciousssss" as the light catches the stone. <3

Kisses,

Angela

P.S. some obligatory ring closeups <3

My Budget Korean Skincare Routine

Hi lovelies! Today I'm going to let you know about my Korean skincare routine. ^^ When I lived in the States, I basically followed the same Clinique 3-step routine I had since high school. That was ok for a while, but when I was in my twenties my skin started to need a little more TLC. Once I moved to Seoul, I became concerned about the effects of the pollution and time spent outside walking on my skin. Luckily, Korean skincare is very affordable, very effective, and VERY available! There are skincare and cosmetics stores on every corner in Seoul! 

One of the distinguishing characteristics of Korean skincare routines is how many steps they have compared to what I used to do. There were essences and sheet masks and tons of stuff I'd never even heard of!

Like wtf is this facial mist everyone is obsessed with?

The trick is to add each step in one at a time and see how your skin reacts to it. My skin has always been pretty clear, but switching to a Korean routine has really helped soften and brighten my skin. Hopefully it's been helping prevent wrinkles too! 

As for the prices of my products, I try to keep them affordable as I'm only working part time these days. When I was working full time, I could afford the more expensive dept store brands...but I've still managed to come up with a great routine for my skin on a budget. ^^

By the way, my skin type is normal-dry depending on how well hydrated I am. It definitely runs a bit drier in the cold months, so my winter/spring products are a little heavier than my summer/fall stuff. 

I'll split the routine into 3 parts, as follows~~~

Part 1: Cleansing

Step 1: remove eye makeup

This is the first step! Use a gentle remover and a cotton pad or balls and softly press down on the eye area. Never use harsh tugging or sweeping motions. 

My choice: My favorite remover is Clinique Take the Day Off, but Korea has some great budget ones. I love the Innisfree Apple Juicy Eye Makeup Remover, but these days I'm actually using a Japanese remover from Bifesta I picked up at Olive Young.

I'm sure many of you have heard that double cleansing is key to a Korean skincare routine. Here's how that works:

Step 2: Oil/balm cleanser

First you need to apply an oil or balm cleanser to dry skin to remove your makeup and sunscreen. I'm using an oil cleanser now, but I usually prefer balm cleansers (they're easier to remove and don't get in your eyes and much). Don't be afraid to take it over your eyes to remove any lingering eye makeup. Then rinse well with warm (never hot!) water.

My choice: I'm using the Innisfree Apple Juicy cleansing oil. As for balm cleansers, I recommend Banila Cleanse It Zero, Lush Ultrabland, and The BodyShop's Chamomile cleansing balm. 

Step 3: Cleansing milk/foam

The next step is to cleanse one more time with a gentle, low pH cleanser. Tbh, I'm not using a low pH cleansing foam at the moment but I'm happy with mine until it runs out. There are tons of options out there though! Hadolabo makes a gentle cleansing foam if you prefer something foaming. I'll look into Missha's Super Aqua cleansing milk next. Whatever you use, make sure it doesn't dry out your skin or leave it feeling tight. I use an all natural konjac sponge from Innisfree to really make sure I'm deeply cleansing. 

My choice: Innisfree Olive Real cleansing foam

Step 4: Exfoliate

Twice a week or so I exfoliate gently with a scrub. I have one with really fine grains for all over exfoliation, then a sugar scrub mask I just use on my nose once a week. If you prefer chemical exfoliant treatments like AHA or BHA, this is when you should use them. I'll probably start adding their into my routine this summer.

My choice: Skinfood strawberry black sugar scrub 

Yes to Grapefruit daily facial scrub

Part 2: Hydrating Layers

This is the fun part where you can really mix and match treatments for your skin type! There are so many options it can get overwhelming, so I recommend starting small. This is also where most of your money in your routine should go. I follow the Caroline Hirons school of thought: pay more for treatments and serums than creams. Do you spend more money on the outfit or the coat covering it up? Let's go!

Step 5: Hydrating Mist

This step isn't super necessary, I just enjoy it. After cleansing, I spray a pH adjusting mist over my face and let it settle for a minute to balance things and give myself a nice canvas for my treatments. If you're not using a low pH cleanser, I also recommend a pH balancing toner. Any hydrating mist you like works though, even Evian. Vichy makes a nice basic one too.

My choice: Dr. G Hydra Fresh pH Mist

Step 6: First essence

Korea has a different attitude towards toners than the US of my youth. I remember the old Sea Breeze days. Even my Clinique Type 2 I used for years had exfoliating properties and contained alcohol. Korea eschews astringent toners and instead uses watery hydrating treatments to prep your skin for moisture. There are lots of options, but the Missha FTE is my tried and true favorite. You can apply it with a cotton square, but that wastes a lot of product. Instead, I put a few drops in my hands and splash it directly onto my face. Pat gently for full absorption.

My choice: Missha First Treatment Essence 

Step 7: Hydrating toner

These are actually usually called toners or lotions and are slightly thicker than first treatments. They're still very watery, however, and I apply them the same way. The one two punch of first essence and hydrating toner is great to prep your skin for the heavier treatments! 

My choice: Actually a Japanese product, and one of my HGs. Lots of other bloggers have written about it! 

Hadolabo gokujyun lotion. You can buy it at Watsons or Olive Young. There's a blue one, which is supposed to be brightening, and a white one which is supposed to be more hydrating. I love them both equally. ^^

Step 8: Eye cream

You should absolutely apply eye cream before any serums or essences that will inhibit absorption in the eye area. I use the same one basically twice a day, but I do have a slightly heavier one (weirdly called a serum) that's very viscous and sticky for a few nights a week. 

My choice: Innisfree Eco Science eye cream

Missha Time Revolution Night Repair Science Activator eye serum 


Part 3: More Layers!

Step 9: Serums and ampoules

This can involve however many products you need for your skin. I tend to use just 1-2mornings and 3-4 at night. When layering, apply them in order of consistency: lighter first, then heavier. 

My choice: I change them up by season, but the one I can't live without is the Missha Time Revolution Night Repair Science Activator Borabit Ampoule (phew! Long name!) hereafter known as the "purple one" lol. It's meant to be a dupe of the Estée Lauder Night Repair serum, and the ingredients list is similar. Apply that one morning and night. 

I also like: 

The Body Shop Nutriganics Drops of Youth

Scinic Aqua all in one ampoule 

Innisfree Canola Honey serum

Innisfree Ginger Oil serum (especially for winter--that stuff is rich!)

Part 4: Finishing Touches

Step 10: Face oil

This is a step I've gotten into recently, and is not necessary for everyone. I only use it at night tbh. Just put a couple drops in your hands, run them together, then gently press the oil into your face over the serums.

My choice: Dioderma carrot oil (actually it's a German brand, my friend Stella brought me some from a recent trip. Thanks, girl! <3)

Step 11: Moisture cream

You should have a finishing cream to to seal in all your products and make your skin super soft. As I said, an expensive cream isn't very important. Just choose one you like. Your face probably feels like a 10 layer wedding cake with all the products now. That means your doing it right! ;)

My choice: The Faceshop Mango Seed volume butter. I'm so addicted the the scent! It has a cute heart shaped applicator/ facial massager too. 

Laneige Water Bank cream or gel cream (the latter for summer or combination skin)

Step 12: Sleeping Pack

You might ask "Angela, my face is already covered in crap! Do I really need one more just for night!?" I would say, you don't NEED one, but try and see if it makes a difference! I use mine every night because I give no f#%^s, but try a couple nights a week and see what works for you.

My choice: Laneige Water Bank sleeping back

Innisfree Green Tea sleeping pack

Step 13: Sheet masks (optional)

These are crazy popular in Korea, and for good reason. I don't do them as frequently as I should, but they really do give your skin an instant shot of moisture and plumpness. I use these directly after step 8 (eye cream), and nothing else after. Just leave the mask on the directed time then pat all the goodness into your skin right before bed. Don't rinse it off! I recommend sheet masks once or twice a week, but you do you. ^^

Step 14: Sunscreen (NOT optional)

The best thing I ever did for my skin when I moved to Korea was start wearing sunscreen (or sun cream as it's usually called here) every day. I'm serious, rain or shine, put that shit on your face! Even if you're just staying inside, UV rays can come in through the windows. Anti-aging products are awesome, but they tend to make your skin photosensitive. Daily sunscreen is also the best for age prevention, trust me! A good sunscreen will glide over your other products and provide a silly base for your makeup/primer.

My choice: Missha All Around Safe Block Essence Sun SPF 45/ PA+++ (the pink one).

Fresh faced and ready to start the day! :3

Did you make it to the end? Lol. I know, it's a lot. I plan on making some changes later in the year, but this is working great for me for now. Have you tried any of these products? Feel free to ask any questions about products or routine in the comments! 

Kisses,

Angela

Style Inspiration: Sailor Moon!

Ok, lovelies, raise your hands if you are or ever were a fan of Sailor Moon! I've been obsessed with her adventures since I was a little girl and used to rush home from school to watch it in the afternoons. Have you been watching the remake: Sailor Moon Crystal? I have, and it's refreshing my love for Usagi and her friends all over again.

Not only am I reliving my youth, I'm starting to get super excited for spring here in Korea! It actually is starting to feel warmer this week, so my mind is going full tilt fantasizing about cherry blossoms, picnics in the park with LBF, and adorable spring fashions. I thought: why not look for inspiration from the Sailor Scouts? ^^

I love their looks in the opening a lot, so I created very literal interpretations for the following sets. They definitely look like something you'd see lovely Seoulistas walking around wearing, don't they? Don't forget the cute umbrellas! (click on the sets for shopping info)

Sailor Moon, Soldier of Love and Justice. Usagi's signature color is pink, and it reflects her lovely personality perfectly. She's got a lot of love and compassion, and a lot of aegyo (as they say in Korea lol). The replica rabbit umbrella is extra adorable! I want that Luna bag too! 

Sailor Mercury, Soldier of Water and Wisdom. Ami's disposition is a bit more intellectual. She's calm and studious, and these pretty outfits in her signature light blue would be perfect for her. She's secretly a fan of romance novels, so a few subtle feminine features like ruffles and lace are fun.

Sailor Mars, Soldier of Fire and Passion. I've always viewed Rei as a bit more badass, but she's also more conservative than the other girls. She is a Shinto priestess part-time, and her outlook on life is very no-nonsense. Just because she doesn't care much for guys, however, doesn't mean she can't wear cute clothes!  

Just wanted to break up your reading with another reason to love this show: Tuxedo Kamen -samaaaaaa! Probably my first crush ever. 

Sailor Jupiter, Soldier of Thunder and Courage. Makoto might look a bit intimidating at first because she's so tall and strong, but she's secretly a domestic goddess who loves cooking, cleaning, and gardening. Channel your inner girly girl with lovely pink shoes and a very feminine fragrance. Don't forget the signature rose earrings and replica umbrella!



Sailor Venus, Solider of Love and Beauty. After Usagi, Minako was probably my favorite Sailor Scout growing up--I lived for that long blonde hair and red bow! As an aspiring idol (or successful idol depending on the series), her look is fashion forward but never overdone. Orange isn't a color I turn to often, but I might have to give it a go this spring! we also share an obsession with boy bands kkkk.

What do you think? Which look is your favorite or best suits your personal style? I'm an Usagi, myself. ^^ Give me ALL the pink!

If you're a fan of Sailor Moon (or used to be back in the day), I highly recommend giving the remake Sailor Moon Crystal a chance if you haven't seen it yet. While the original show from the nineties had a lot of filler and a Power Rangers-esque "Monster of the Week" formula, the remake more closely follows the original comics and is gorgeous to behold.

Now, if you don't mind, I'll get back to binge watching seasons 1 and 2 again. ^o^

Kisses,

Angela

P.S. New video reviews coming next week on my Youtube channel! <3

Korean Dating: Pensions and Weekend Getaways

Hi Lovelies! Shhh... whisper to me: have you ever been to a pension in the countryside with your lover??

I just got back from a romantic winter weekend getaway with the Lovely BF (LBF) and felt inspired to write about this charming facet of Korean dating.

Road trip time!! ^o^

Y'all know that Seoul is a huge city with lots to do, but sometimes it's nice to get out of town with your SO. Especially when the weather has been such crap!

This is what Seoul looks like lately. 

So maybe you need a break? You choose a destination with pretty scenery and fun activities, then you need a place to stay. Maybe you want something a bit nicer than the tacky love motels/minimalist minbaks or a bit cheaper than the expensive resort hotels. Why not try a pension?

Korean pensions are like romantic guesthouses for couples. Well, they're not necessarily exclusively for couples but clearly have that in mind. Some of them have themes and decor that range from cute to cheesy--sometimes tasteful, but rarely elegant. These days there are more elegant options, but they're pricier. There have been more spa pensions popping up, which are kind of like tiny spa hotels.

Fancy! Read on CNN for more info. ^^

They're usually cozy, however, and try to make a lovely space for couples to spend a day or two enjoying each other's company. There's usually a big bed, a hot tub, a nice TV, a balcony for watching sunsets, swimming pool, etc. Some offer free breakfast. There's also usually a grill and picnic area so you and your sweetie can make cook BBQ together (because nothing says romance like samgyeopsal and beer lol). I'm not totally sure, but I think prices for basic rooms usually average from 100,000 to 200,000 per night.

LBF just decided to take me on a spontaneous long weekend to Seonjaedo, a little island near Incheon.

For getaway destinations, check out CNN Travel's list of 33 beautiful islands to visit in Korea!

It was freezing cold, so our beach walking hours were limited, but the winter sea was lovely and walking on a snowy beach was pretty magical. Even better was relaxing in a hot tub with champagne ad watching the snow outside! We also cooked our own BBQ for the first time, which was super fun and delicious! ^^

LBF is an excellent cook ;)

Not sure what to pack? Keep in mind that when visiting the country, you can keep it casual compared to Seoul.

See Korean Winter Weekend Getaway by luhunnie for shopping info.

I suggest bringing the following essentials:

• weekend bag or cute backpack
• a warm ass coat, cuz Korean winters are cold af
• sunscreen--wear it every day, even in winter! 
• a good rich lip balm with SPF
• boots! I like some heavy duty ones for snow outside and comfy ones too. 
• warm clothes, like fleece lined leggings and sweaters.
• cute PJ's (or sexy lingerie, depending on your style)
• rollerball fragrance (you don't want to bring a big bottle and risk it breaking)
• champagne, because duh <3

I returned to Seoul feeling refreshed from our short trip, so I highly recommend booking a weekend in a pension as a cure for the city blues!

Lovely weekend trips are my cure for Korea's bitter winters. <3

What are your favorite weekend destinations outside of the city? More importantly, does your BF allow you to post his pics online? Maybe I'll talk him into it one of these days ㅋㅋㅋㅋ.